Steve Eighinger

Those wacky Florida lawbreakers are at it again

By Herald-Whig
Posted: Jan. 15, 2019 7:15 am

For more than a decade, our "Morons of the Month" report has unintentionally seemed to feature an inordinate amount of medal winners from Florida.

Apparently, I'm not alone in having noticed the number of wacky lawbreakers headquartered in the Sunshine State. There are now a handful of websites dealing with unusual crimes that seem to call Florida home.

Here are details of the exploits of three more of those wild-and-crazy Floridians:

Bronze medal

Apparently, Dominick Breedlove was not familiar with the old saying about never getting a second chance to make a first impression.

Breedlove, 24, went into a Kohl's department store in Brooksville, Fla., for a job interview. Following that interview, and on his way out of the store, Breedlove thought it was a good idea to steal a pair of Nike shoes.

Breedlove was apprehended moments after he exited the store and charged with retail theft, according to mimaiherald.com.

Although there was no official statement from Kohl's officials, it's highly unlikely Breedlove got that job.

Silver medal

Drinking and driving is never a good combination, but this Florida woman took that bad idea to a different level.

Mary Dostal drove through two fences and crashed into an airplane at the Sarasota Bradenton International Airport.

Deputies reported finding the 39-year-old Dostal in the driver's seat of the vehicle in question, which was still running, and noted a "strong odor of alcohol."

While talking to a deputy, Dostal said she thought she was in Ohio. She then staggered toward the deputy's vehicle during field sobriety tests, according to the affidavit.

"No one was hurt, no one was injured ... so that's what matters," an airport official said.

There was, however, quite a bit of damage to the plane that was crashed into by Dostal. The exact amount and degree of charges to be filed are still being determined, according to ABC News.

I'm just guessing here, but I imagine someone probably informed Dostal that Ohio is not real close to Florida.

Gold medal

There's not a lot of information available on this arrest, but what there is assures a gold medal for Richard Clayton, 25, of Orlando, Fla.

Powerboat races were stopped near Clearwater, Fla., so authorities could pull a drunk -- and naked -- man from the water.

Deputies with the Pinellas County Sheriff's Department wrote in the arrest report that Clayton was drunk -- and naked -- when he swam into the middle of the boat race.

The race was forced to shut down until Clayton could be removed from the water -- and presumably re-clothed.