I'd like to think I'm a positive supporter and most of the time I am, but I caught myself saying something to my son after a sporting loss that I regretted almost immediately. It was right then, I realized something. He needed my support, not criticism. I am not his coach, therefore I don't need to weigh in here.
When Dad died, I lost my best friend. He was my sounding board and rock. Right after he died I would look for him. I would look for him in the kids and in everyday life, but I also would look for things I had missed ... something I hadn't seen, messages that had been left behind.